Well, it’s been a very eventful week. First of all, I am pleased to say that my Asthma seems to be under control, claws crossed. Talking of claws, the Male Servant very skilfully, gave me a manicure this morning.

We have had a very eventful Easter Weekend ….. the Servants have been attending to the Estate Gardens and as we have been enjoying lovely sunny weather, I have been taking my ease out there with them, watching them work.  A lot of the undergrowth has been cleared so that there is no danger of me being attacked by skulking feline vagabond footpads! Truly, the grounds are a lot safer now!

Minnie, with her Servant, recently moved into the adjoining estate. Yesterday she had an extremely unpleasant experience and was attacked whilst out on her evening stroll, by a slavering, slobbering, bumptious hound and had to take refuge high up on a wall amongst thick ivy. Fortunately for all concerned, I was on top of the situation and dispatched the Man Servant with a ladder to undertake rescue operations which I am very pleased to say were completely successful especially as Minnie was recently a Day Boarder with us and is a new neighbour and one must “cultivate” one’s neighbours, mustn’t one?

Yesterday, the Woman Servant who was completely exhausted from directing and controlling the Man Servant, took herself out to lunch during which time the Man Servant very commendably, forgoing the opportunity of putting his feet up, unpacked the steam carpet cleaner and proceeded to clean the kitchen carpet. Needless to say, when the Woman Servant returned, full of strong drink, she immediately told him that he shouldn’t have commenced this operation unsupervised and needless to say he had not done a proper job!

The Servants have been complaining that they have been working very hard recently and have requested two days off so that they can have a short break … a break from what, I ask you ?????  They live the Life of Riley here with me,  however I have agreed to their request and have engaged the services of a female “temp”. Not sure if I can deduct the cost of this from their wages though!

I didn't want to start this week's Blog with a complaint but I am afraid I have to. The Servants are driving me crazy. What can be simpler about the morning routine? Food, then a brush, a visit to the Closet, finished off with a second brushing ... simple as that ! Do you think they can get it right? The Man Servant even has the cheek to bring his cup of tea with him when he comes in to do his brushing duty. Oh for the old days when I had everyone wrapped round my little paw!

I had to go to the vet the other day as I was becoming short of breath. I was unable to see my usual surgeon Mr Cook, so had to see Dr Claire. She seemed to think that I had polyps in my throat which sound rather nasty - a bit like having jelly fish down there and nobody wants those - but all is well as it turns out that I was suffering from hay fever and a mild asthma attack.  I must be honest, the deputy vet was very thorough, and she gave me a steroid injection to help with the inflammation in my throat, as well as an anti biotic and by gum, did that steroid kick my appetite into overdrive which rather caught the Servants flat-footed forcing them to make frequent visits to the shops and preparing me lots of extra meals.

I allowed the Servants to entertain some friends to dinner last night which was a sad mistake as there was much carousing and drinking and one couldn't move this morning for empty wine bottles! I certainly didn't expect them to drink a bottle of red wine each and leave the house looking like a tip and I must say that service this morning was certainly not up to scratch!

Skulduggery

Well, things are not too good here as I heard the Servants talking about a friend of theirs, whose feline employer requires temporary accommodation.  Before I go on I just want to say that I wasn’t meant to hear this, but the Male Servant, who is hard of hearing, does tend to below somewhat so I was able to overhear their skulduggery which I will come back to.  Before doing so, I will say, that if the Servants have time to have friends, then they are not busy enough. Oh for the days of Queen Vic when servants knew their place, worked 18 hour days and didn’t answer back!



To get back to the skulduggery going on behind my back, they have offered their friends feline employer temporary accommodation HERE in my house!!

I gather it is only for one day while her new home is being prepared, but nevertheless it’s an absolute cheek and I am going to have to make my feelings very clear as this sort of behaviour is totally unacceptable. I won’t do this until after the event as this would be uncharitable, and I will just have to pretend I don’t know anything about the matter and the Servants had better make damn sure that this unwanted visitor is kept well out of sight.



On a more positive note, the Servants have become quite efficient at opening the bedroom curtains whilst I am enjoying my breakfast so that the sunny windowsill is ready for my convenience as soon as I have finished eating. The Maidservant went out yesterday and purchased some Burns Senior citizen cat food which is supposed to be the very best; if it’s not, I look forward to projectile vomiting it over the new carpets and they can get down on their hands and knees and clean up the mess.



The Man Servant’s poor hearing is a bit of a problem as when he is on duty in the kitchen with the door closed, he very often doesn’t hear me calling out to be let in. This is very distressing and inconvenient but fortunately the Woman Servant doesn’t have such a disability and she is very quick to open the door for me.